Embracing The Grey

Embracing the grey, is it an issue?

Embracing the greys can be a social dilemma, a personal worry, or even a stigma of growing older, but finding interest in the unique journey of aging can lead to self-discovery and empowerment.

Going grey brings up so many issues. What is your relationship with “going grey”? I mean it’s going to happen, but we seem to be always chasing the holy grail of youth, as if getting older is some sort of sin. Is it really? 

Why do we constantly reach for the bottle or run to the hairdresser every 6 weeks? Why can we not just settle into what is actually happening? Hey, don’t get me wrong I have grey hair and I bleach the hell out it. I definitely do not want to go grey, But why not? For me I know I’m holding onto my youth, I admit it. And I dare say I will carry on until I am in my box. Maybe it’s also because I am a hairdresser.

Social /sexual empowerment

The Grombe movement has been  gaining more momentum over the past couple of years, with young women modelling silver hair.

https://grombre.com/about/ We believe there are more important things in life than the beauty standards that women are so often told define our value, and we’re finding liberation and empowerment to live fully and celebrate the complexities that make us beautiful in each season of our lives.”

This community is great for empowering you in all your wonderful uniqueness. Grombre.com/sezuhn

More women are choosing grey at a time that is, or could be age, appropriate. You only have to look on social media and on the catwalks to see it. There are women going cold turkey and just letting their colour grow out with a two-tone effect. And some badass women colouring it silver.

Do you feel empowered?

I’m regularly reminded of my ageing process as my face falls into the camera as I look down, and I don’t necessarily feel any less attractive than I did years ago. I am definitely a lot freer; I can go to the shops now without my matching underwear on just in case I have an accident!

Does seeing grey hair in the mirror confront the physical image you have of yourself? Is grey hair giving up on youth? Do you think you would be taken as seriously at work? And what about your partner, would they still find you attractive or do you even give two hoots

Hair is a funny thing. It holds so much weight and has so much impact. What is your inner narrative? I guess that is the most important question to answer. If you’re strong, sexy, powerful in your mind, what are a few grey hairs, no matter what your age?

Grey Hair, Don’t Care: Many celebrities across the globe spoke about how they are embracing their greying locks and even their ageing skin. … Let’s face it, the texture looks gorgeous and there are so many ways in which you can style your greying tresses.

Silver hair trending with celebs.

Celebrities are still loving this silver colour. A silver platinum colour is a bold move. Long gone are the days when going grey  was a bad thing amongst the trendy. In fact, it’s become one of the coolest hair trends to try since 2019; stars like Cara Delevingne have been rocking silver hair for years.  Kelly Osbourne, Nicole Riche and Lady Gaga rocked the silver platinum look.

Check out this link of celebs rocking the grey https://www.purewow.com/beauty/15-celebrities-with-gray-hair

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Its all In your Head 

A positive perspective on aging encompasses both mental and physical aspects. As we grow older, we gain deeper confidence, self-assurance, and inner strength, knowing who we are without seeking approval as we might have in our youth.

Grey hair is actually hair that has no pigment and is the result of the melanocytes — the cells that produce pigment — becoming damaged or dying. This happens naturally as we get older, and some scientists argue that exactly when, is governed by your genes, rather than by your lifestyle. So if it’s such a natural occurrence, why not be positive?


A few months ago, a friend called Sarah came to me with a dilemma. During lockdown her colour had started to grow out, giving her the chance to really question how she felt about her grey hair. We had a few long chats about it, and she spent time meditating about it and really weighing up the reasons for not colouring her hair to cover up the grey.

How we worked together 

Together we decided to have some fun with the grey and enhance it in a positive way. So, I lightened up her artificial hair colour by using several techniques to create interest and dimension, before adding purple. 

We wanted to work with her salt and pepper natural colour and have fun by adding purple to her hair. We also gave her the option of changing the colour on a temporary basis by using wash out colours. Also, if she decided to no longer try fun colours, we could easily opt for a more natural temporary colour, which would help to grow out softly and easily, thus making the transition to her natural colour seamless.

“I worked with Karen to find the best way to transition to grey. It really was a collaboration between us, Karen was conscientious, doing research, sending me links of women who had transitioned through the grey and how they did it. We discussed the best way to use my current colour and how we could make it fun.” 

“I have always loved bright colour, but many colourists would shy away from trying it.  Karen is brilliant with colour.  We both liked the idea of a balayage using the hair that has already been coloured, lightening the already coloured hair using organic products and then adding purple to the ends,  I couldn’t have been happier with the results.”

Are you considering embracing your grey?

Can you relate to Sarah’s story perhaps? 

Are you starting to get fed up with colouring your hair every six weeks, when those pesky roots start showing? 

Do you feel like embracing your grey in a funky way?

Is now the time to start to embrace your natural hair colour? And do you know how you would like to achieve this?

Do you have support?

Have you started to embrace your grey and your friends have been shocked or negative? 

Are your friends being supportive? Have you been met with words of encouragement, with words of amazement? Maybe they are just confused as to why you would choose to go grey?

Has your hairdresser tried to talk you out of it, saying “it would suit you better with colour”? 

My advice to you is to surround yourself with people who are positive and supportive of your decision to listen to your inner voice and your reasons for embracing the grey. By doing this, it will make your transition to grey liberating and empoweringHave you decided to go for it?

Once you decide to step onto the path to embracing your grey, it throws up all sorts of feelings and emotions. Are you worried going grey may make you look older?

Maybe you’re only in your 30s and 40s and you’re starting to question whether this is the right time to stop colouring your hair?

Whatever the wobbles, there is a reason you have chosen to step on this path to embrace your natural colour. Maybe it is a fascination with those silvery highlights, and maybe it is because you want to be authentic with yourself and to see what your natural colour actually looks like.


Your options

So now you are coming to a place of peace with your decision, how are you going to achieve it? Here’s where I can help and support you. You have a few options.

As you already have colour on your hair, you could have your hair regularly cut, meaning the artificial colour will gradually disappear, leaving your natural colour to grow through. 

Depending on the length of your hair, this could take many months and at some point, could look quite stark in contrast, especially if you have a high percentage of grey, with very dark artificial colour on the ends. This process is not for the faint hearted and a brave move as it takes time.

Another option is to cut your hair as short as you dare; cutting as much of the artificial colour away, allowing your natural colour to show through. This of course is fabulous if you don’t mind having a total change. Until your natural colour grows out, you could funk your hair up by wearing head scarves, or you could do what my friend did and have fun with colours whilst growing out the artificial colour.

 You could come to visit me and I could start to remove the artificial colour step by step or possibly in one day. This is a long in-depth process and takes patience and time and regular up keeps and committing to salon products.


There is a very talented artist on Instagram @jackmartincolorist, who does the most amazing transformations in one day by adding lots of highlights to shift the artificial colour and then tone with silver on top. This may be possible in one step or over several appointments. This involves lots of maintenance visits, as you will need to keep the tone silver and invest in excellent salon products. This is a must! 

Obviously, this process comes with a high price tag as it takes a long time and a high degree of expertise to achieve this look successfully. The likes of Jane Fonda and Sharon Osborne have both gone down this route. Take a look at their transformations. The images of before and after are by the master Jack Martin https://www.instagram.com/jackmartincolorist/?hl=en

There is lots of information out there; including Facebook support groups, plus plenty of inspiration to be found on Instagram. There are also books and websites to give you advice and support. I found these really helpful:

 Anne Kreamer-Going Gray, this is an extract from her book -Can I be sexually attractive as a gray-haired, middle-aged woman? and Will I be discriminated against in the work world? Her answers are surprising and provocative. 

Going grey gracefully Facebook group. https://www.facebook.com/groups/550897028360004/

Stages of Grey https://www.instagram.com/stagesofgrey/

Katie goes platinum blogs https://katiegoesplatinum.com

Instagram Grombre https://www.instagram.com/grombre/ A radical celebration of the natural phenomenon of grey hair.

Contact me Karen 07796170061 https://www.instagram.com/karensilkhairdressing/

When you decide you want to grow out the artificial colour, I can talk you through the steps and together we will get your hair to where you want it to be. I am here to help and support you on your road to embracing your natural colour with all its silvery splendour. 


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